What do make of this story? It’s from Liu An, a Daoist philosopher prominent during a lull in Daoist thought between the two heights. He lived and died more than 100 years before Christ was born. The book he sponsored, the Huainanzi, is the source of today’s story. [i]

One of the first things you will notice is that the diviners do not agree with the community. You may say to yourself that that’s because they have special knowledge as diviners. I think that’s letting yourself off the hook too easily. There has to be more to learn here.

One lesson from the story is that it can be good to think differently than the crowd. Even though the diviners were in the minority with how they thought, they are the wise ones of the story. 

Another lesson is what it means to be a good community. When tragedy befalls the diviners, the community consoles them. When fortune favors the diviners, the community congratulates them. Paul in his letter to the Romans, referred to this as rejoicing with those who rejoice and mourning with those who mourn (12:15).

The diviners do not assume that the immediate result of an event will be the final result; they can see how even things that seem bad now will lead to good. They can see when misfortune is only temporary. This type of understanding requires a suspension of judgment. Richard Rohr describes this as avoiding “too quickly labeling, analyzing,  or categorizing things in or out, good or bad.”[ii]  Further, he warns against “resistance, knee-jerk reactions, or defensiveness.”[iii]  This openness allows us to see many possibilities and avoid fixating on only one possible outcome. 

Our minds have all sorts of tools to help us think faster. We learn processes and are able to repeat steps without conscious processing. Our spinal cords enable us to move back from danger before the signal even reaches our brain. Unfortunately this also has a downside. We stereotype people based on gender, race, ethnicity, and social roles. We can miss what someone is saying or needs because it doesn’t fit our schema for them. We can be fearful when it’s not necessary. We don’t let individuals step out of our expectations. These are knee-jerk reactions.

Back to the story. If you’re familiar with one of the more recent versions of this story, then you may remember a farmer rather than a family of diviners. In the version with the farmers, the farmer says “Maybe it’s good. Maybe it’s not” or “Maybe yes. Maybe no.”

There’s a five syllable word for this: equanimity. It refers to being even tempered, and evenness of mind especially under stress. [iv]

Richard Rohr explains that “you see things as they really are–and also for what they are not at all.” For Rohr, you are able to perceive things without judgment or overlay. He says, “Equanimity is the very nature of the soul. Jesus would have called it ‘the peace that the world cannot give nor take away’ (John 14:27).” Brian McLaren explains it this way: “The old farmer saw enough unexpected consequences through the years that he had learned not to rush to judgment as quickly as his neighbors” (pg 128, Life After Doom). Buddhists refer to the principle of nonattachment. One can observe one’s own emotions without immediately clinging to them. Just because I am happy or sad now does not tell me what will happen in the long run. Don’t judge how you are feeling. Emotions are not good nor bad. 

I am reminded of a verse from the Upanishads, Hindu sacred scriptures:

“Two birds, united always and known by the same name, closely cling to the same tree. One of them eats the sweet fruit; the other looks on without eating” (Mundaka Upanishad 3.1.1). Both of the birds are you. Both are in the same body, the tree.

 Part of you experiences the emotions, pleasure and pain, but part of you is the eternal watching as the emotions and sensations go by. Remember you endure while emotions are temporary. Let your joy last amidst the ups and downs.

Richard Rohr explains, “Being conscious or aware means: I drop to a deeper level than the passing show. I become the calm seer of my dramas from that level. I watch myself compassionate from a little distance almost as if the ‘myself’ is someone else– ‘a corpse’, as St. Francis put it. I dis-identify with my own emotional noise, and no longer let it pull me here and there, up and down” (p 135).

If you have ever had to advise a client or a family member or heard such advice yourself about avoiding catastrophizing or absolutizing then you know the value of equanimity. Absolutizing is the tendency to make partial, relative, or conditional into an absolute. If you start hearing words like always, never, best or worst then absolutizing is happening. With catastrophizing, what might be bad or yuck becomes awful, the worst, or even the worst ever. These tendencies will push you out of balance and leave you jumping around with each new experience or piece of information. 

It may not have made it into the SPICES, but Quakers are known for being calm and even keeled. One example of how this shows up is the tendency towards Quaker understatement. Even the most intense debate could be described as merely a spirited discussion. The tendency to return to silence when emotions get heated is another. 

Author and philosopher Katie Kamara describes how one should be “Feeling deeply without treating every feeling as fact.”[v]  Feelings are valid, but they are not proof on their own. Emotions come from experiences and the way you have been taught. Often they come from before you could critically analyze what someone is telling you. They can also come from past traumas. Just because this situation is similar to a time when you were hurt doesn’t mean it’s exactly the same.

Your pain is real, but depression–depression is a liar. It will tell you that you have no friends when they’re right next to you. It will tell you things will never get better when most times they will. The shadow of depression makes the bad things seem worse and the good things seem not as good. Feel your feelings, but confront the scripts playing in your head. These messages that keep whispering to you can pull you out of the present moment and lead you astray. Some scripts will give you the strength to carry on while others undermine you at every step.

Finally, recognize that good can come from bad situations and serious misfortune. Suspend judgment as more information becomes available. Allow yourself to have your own perspective. Let this time be different without letting go of wisdom. This probably isn’t the best or the worst thing you have experienced. Be aware of your emotions, but don’t let them control you.

Queries:

• When has something bad happening to you turned out for good in the long run?
• How has knowing your emotions improved a situation?
• What does being a Quaker mean to you in stressful times?

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[i][i][i] https://www.britannica.com/biography/Liu-An

[ii] The Naked Now pg 49

[iii] pg 50

[iv] https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/equanimity

[v] 10/01/26 Facebook post