Dear Friends,

When speech is free, what do we decide to say?  There was an old Native American (Cherokee) adage that a person is given only so many words to speak in a lifetime, to choose each one of them well. One thing that was noted about many Quakers is being slow to speak and contemplative about word choices. There is a lot of talk about free speech this week. In our country, free speech is about not having to silence a word for fear of government overreach.  But can we appreciate this more?  How do we speak to one another?  What venue do we choose?  Are we conversationalists?  Jokesters? Text and email alone? How do we listen without prejudicially selecting what we want to hear?  Have we taken off all the biases that are attached to our speech, our communication, our paradigms of thought or patterns of thinking?

Speaking any words is about communicating. I wonder sometimes what it is I really want to say.  How is it going to be received?  How can I choose my words the best way possible so that they will be heard?  How do we build up habits of discerning speech?  How do people know that what we say is true?  How can people forgive me for times when my speech has not been founded on compassion and grace?

If our lives do not represent what we say, then no one will believe what we have said.  That’s one of the basics of integrity as a testimony for us is that our lives are to be as congruent as possible with our speech.  But we are all working on some personal stuff.  It’s called growth. Most of the things that are keeping us from being congruent between word and deed are unconscious, so we have to respond to ourselves with love and grace and be willing to see the faults when they first show themselves to us. Holding someone else to a higher standard than we hold ourselves is not loving or graceful.  We are all growing.  How can we grow in the area of speech? Can we listen without bias? Are we truthful to ourselves about these biases that we all have? How carefully do we choose our nonverbal communication?  Is it loving?  Is it graceful?  Do our communications show integrity?  Do what we say and how we act show a deep belief in equality of all people?  How about peace?  Does what you say bring peace to a situation?  To all the people involved?  Are you saying it as simply as possible with clarity?  Does it encourage others and help with building community? All of this talk about free speech has made me appreciate more that we have venues for this free speech, so what do I want to communicate?  How do I want to use my free speech?

I love you.  I love this church.  I love this community.  That love is growing, and hopefully that shows more and more in my choice of words and my ability to listen.  Right now, while we have some free speech, it is important to use it wisely and for the betterment of the world. This may take the form of activism like writing a letter to the editor for our paper or writing to your representative or senator.  Maybe you are led to be in more protests or to show up at town hall meetings, or maybe you are led to remain still and pray.  Everyone is different, but all need to do what is real for them and to say what is on their hearts.

I don’t have these answers.  I only have more questions for myself, and it is obvious that I have edges that need growth and are growing. I’m going to appreciate the right to speech more, and so I am going to be more discerning in what I say.

You can have the chance to use this communication with other people in this church on Sunday.  This Sunday, Peace and Social Concerns will meet at 9:00, 9:45 is our coffee and fellowship time, 10:00 starts meeting for worship, and we will end with a fellowship potluck at 11:00.  Please come and enjoy the different ways we can be in community with one another.

Before I sign off, we will be adding something in the service to better represent an old Quaker tradition.  When the service ends in most meetings each person shakes the others’ hands and wishes them peace.  To begin with, in the 1660’s this showed peace and equality by rejecting the bows and curtsies used by the aristocracy. Today, this is the normal way of ending a Quaker service for many meetings worldwide.  We are going to be ending the services with a handshake between all the people in the sanctuary as a way of showing equality, community and peace (or an elbow bump if handshaking seems too germy for you).  We can learn to look forward to that handshake (or elbow bump) of friendship throughout the weeks ahead.  https://quakerspeak.com/video/handshake/?UTM_Source=FriendsJournal&UTM_medium=website&UTM_campaign=crosspromo

Peace,

Leigh